For Once, For Myself

Good morning, dear readers, but this post is not for you.

Blogging has been an amazing journey for me. It will continue to be. After a few flings with everything social as social can be, I returned to blogging. In my heart, i.e., as you may have noticed, not so much in fact – given the frequency of my posts.

As you read this post – I am elsewhere. Far from the madding crowd, as one would say. Really far. Where I am, what I am doing, how I am however, is something that I cannot tell you. The keyword is cannot, not won’t.

In these few years of blogging, I have met you (if you are still reading this post after the opening statement) a million times because I have thought of you in every post. Yes, there is that paradigm that every writer is supposed to follow — about writing for one’s own self.

But, indulge me.

What is a writer without a reader?

I have chosen conversation over everything else: with you. And in that selfish conversation I have discovered myself. Over and over again. Because of you.

But this post – this one post – is not for you. This one post is for me. Today, the world that we live in is a fascinating one. It allows a person to be in two places at the same time. Even as you read this post (which, as you would recall, is for me) I am somewhere else — living in a different world.

I write this post, for myself.

Because it fulfils my long dream of being at two places at the same time. Whenever I had imagined it, I always considered it impossible because I imagined physical representation of my self in two places — aware of my existence in both the locations.

Today, I am aware and oblivious, at the same time, that I can be aware and oblivious at the same place. It seems I have struggled for very wrong things in my life.

Flame

I am a sucker for miracles — not because I believe in magic, but because I believe in people. Only people cause magic and miracles. Oftentimes, I have seen no miracles. I could easily say that people have let me down. But, I resist. It is not that people have ceased to cause miracles; it is that I have ceased to see right.

I am, finally, the Wandering Monk. What a moment of glee!

It will be a while, till my meandering brings me back to where I was.

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10 thoughts on “For Once, For Myself

  1. While I know this post is for you, I want to share my two cents.

    I agree we cannot become writers if we didn’t have the reader. I don’t think blogging is just about writing and reading. I think blogging is also about thinking and contemplation and sharing of thoughts, thereby facilitating discovery.

    I like the belief that people create magic and miracles. Brings back some faith.

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  2. To begin with..

    I’m a little worried about you, Just tc..

    There is no magic in people..the magic is in our eyes..yes the magic is in nature..in all things non people- non-technical..

    And I live for myself..I write for me..validation from others was important..it is not now..
    So, the wandering monk..trust me ..be a little selfish-live for you..care for all that is inside you; that yearns to fly..

    and I sincerely hope your meanderings do not bring you to where you were..but at a place which is far better than that..and the best thing would be-only you would know the difference..

    Hmm..go get new eyes. I want my two cents plz ..:)

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  3. Agree with edu’s perspective. Happened to me sometimes, when, through the act of writing, things became clear and something unknown snapped into existence.

    The photo you’ve shared is so apt for the biting cold of december. Feel like cosying up to those rising flames and embrace the warmth. Are you doing it right now, in some far-off place?:-)

    Happened to breeze through a few of your blogs. Man, you write so much and so diversly. And you’ve been working on that novel since 4 years! Truly inspirational to the lazy writer within me who’s still cuddled inside a warm blanket.

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  4. writing for oneself is at once better for the writer and more challenging.. without keeping the reader in view, whom do we keep as a reference point? ourselves? so essentially we force ourselves to judge our thoughts and such revelations can be too tough to handle.. but yes, worth the effort

    Like

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