Of a Decade

Of being friends: One of my best friend is a friend for twenty-two years. In the last decade or so, we have hardly met, geography has had its toll on us, relegating our keeping in touch to the odd email and the even rare phone call. In fact, there’s five of them, since twenty-two years. Another friend, for nineteen years, and another for ten years this December. Hell, we don’t see each other for a few years in between. Only one of them is on my Facebook. We never celebrated x years of knowing each other.

Of celebrations: More often than not, they are silent; inside. You may notice an odd closed fist punched in the air with the accompanying “yesss!”, but that is a fraction of the number of times I celebrate on the inside. I am not a sucker for festivities – however I love being in the midst of festivals for all the grandeur and sense of belonging they bring (the food is an added bonus). There always seems to be a compulsion to celebrate events, more to make a statement than anything else.

Of social standards: It has been a while, but I am now able to ignore social conventions and impositions – to an extent. Difficult, but I manage. If it doesn’t agree with my sense of being, I don’t do it. It obviously creates conflicts and I guess, over time I have learnt to deal with those too. To live in an acceptable way became difficult for me a long time ago. The training since those days has served me well.

What happened in ten years? A lot, obviously, but nothing that is spectacularly notable. But for all that did happen (and not), I am grateful. I feel good inside. A long celebration; an almost never ending carnival of happiness happily makes its way through me.

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10 thoughts on “Of a Decade

  1. i agree that being friends for so long is just great. but for me it differs. i have met some persons just once or twice in my life and have become great friends… for me it doesn’t matter for how long we know each other, what matters is how well we know each other.

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  2. it is indeed rare to seek a sense of ‘congruence’, my dear friend. most of us just comply, even if it creates conflicts. in that sense, i’m glad to have found you – for there sure are conflicts even in non conformance, and it takes a lot to meet such conflicts head on!

    when i look back, i’ve had a lot of friends. many of them great friends, in the sense, we’ve shared a lot in common, and had great times together. and then time has its funny ways of taking us on our own paths. there are a few though, that remain. with these, its a different deal. i don’t keep in touch so much with them, for i don’t feel the need to. i know they’re around, not in the literal sense, but you know…and those are the ones that are precious. 22 years is a long time. i got a few like that, what, almost 20 years now!

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  3. ==Anumita:
    Thank ye! 🙂

    ==Dwai:
    I agree, quality over quantity. But then, relationships, like wine become interesting with time! 🙂

    ==Dharma:
    In fact, there would be more conflicts in non-conformance – just the nature of it. We seek problems because we seek their gifts.

    I know exactly what you mean, perhaps best friends is not the best phrase to describe them. Life-long friends perhaps…?

    ==Abaniko:
    Lucky, indeed! Thank ye! 🙂

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  4. much as i think i cannot think up a comment for this post. a decade of happiness sounds too good to be true. especially when i struggle to make a compact 10 hours happy in a day.

    congratulations though. and may we read more such posts from you.

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  5. ==Phish:
    Perhaps that is not the best way to see it @ 10h vs. 10y.

    Many more than 10h for more than 10d in more than 10m for the last 10y have gone wrong. I guess, what I was talking about, was the residue that we choose to hold close to the heart.

    Matter of choice, really.

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  6. if in a decade u cud keep track of friends, celebrations and social standards, so much to be able to sum things up with satisfaction in a few words, it must have been a good life… lucky…

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  7. ==Gauri:
    Like I said in response to the Phish (above), you gotta think macro. Try and fly. Get a birds-eye-view. It is always a good life. Luck is an insignificant decoration we like to adorn. when you stop sweating the individual debit/credit, the balance sheet is pretty much always a decent one. There are exceptions, but otherwise, it is generally a happy face.
    🙂

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  8. Pingback: Lucky 13 « Gaizabonts

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